Here you will read a list of 17 things not to say to a pregnant, because these things are really annoying to her.
Pregnancy may be one of the most sensitive and complicated times of a woman life. There are many internal and external factors which can increase her emotional state during pregnancy like hormones, stress, body changes, fatigue and inappropriate questions and comments that she frequently being asked.
There are some things that you should never say to a pregnant woman whether you are a friend, a neighbor, a co-worker or even a partener. That’s because most of these comments considered as an offensive question.
So, to help you ensure that other pregnant women never have to hear these unpleasant comments, I’ve shared with you a list of 17 things not to say to a pregnant.
The post is written depending on a question was asked to a group of pregnant ladies about the things that they don’t want to be asked during pregnancy. And as I’m writing this post, I’m currently 15 weeks pregnant and I agree with most of there answers.
I know that you probably don’t mean anything by saying these comments and questions. You may just trying to fill the silence, and starting a chat. But, after reading this post, you can see how those comments are extra irritating to them!
17 things not to say to a pregnant:
1- Telling her your terrifying birth stories:
A lady said: ” I just don’t like when strangers tell me their terrifying vaginal birth stories! I don’t even know your name!”
I totally agree with this lady as there is no single benefit of telling a pregnant what happened to you during giving birth, you will make her more worry when she think of the vaginal delivery.
2- Telling her your terrifying miscarriages stories:
It is very scary to hear like these stories especially in the early pregnancy. A woman shared her experience about that: ” Early in my pregnancy I had a coworker told me in graphic, horrifying detail about all three of her miscarriages. I was like, “omg please stop, why?” and she just kept going. She did end up having a son and loves him to death, but I was like 9 weeks – a very scary time for those kinds of stories”.
3- You are so small :
Or ” you don’t look pregnant enough”.
Or ” You don’t even look pregnant! “.
Or ” You can’t be ____ months, you’re so small! You need to eat more! They baby has no room to grow! ”
Or “are you sure you’re that far along?”
Here are what some pregnant women said:
“I got annoyed when I got told I don’t even look pregnant when I was obviously pregnant just because I’m a smaller build, but had a very noticeable bump”.
“36 weeks and getting asked am I pregnant or people telling me I’m small. I wake up in the same body… EVERY DAY. I know”.
It’s better to stop telling a pregnant that her belly is so small because she might spend days worrying about whether her baby is getting enough nutrients or whether she’s going to give birth to a low weight baby.
4- You are looking so big:
Some comments like:
“You’re looking big, you still working out?”
“You aren’t supposed to gain any weight your first trimester are you?
“Are you sure it’s not twins in there?”
“You are all belly!”
These comments will make her self-conscious about her pregnancy weight gain.
5- (You look so tired) one of the things not to say to a pregnant:
A woman said: ” I stopped going to the cafe by my work because the clerk would loudly announce how tired I looked when I walked in every morning”.
Yes, you don’t need to remember her every now and then that she looks so tired!
6- Enjoy your sleep now!
Or “enjoy the sleep now before they are out, you haven’t seen anything yet!”
Or “Have fun not ever getting any sleep”
Two ladies told us how frustrating to hear like these comments:
“I’ve had insomnia since 35 weeks so when people say this I literally want to punch them lol, I’m already not sleeping so thanks for rubbing it in!”
“Anytime I would say I’m tired I heard “oh just wait.” Or “get used to it, you’ll never sleep again”.
This comments really seem to mean is ” Enjoy yourself now because your life is about to suck!”
7- Your life is going to change dramatically:
A pregnant woman said: ” My family keeps repeating over and over that my life is going to change dramatically and that everything is going to be different. More so in a warning tone. Like I better prepare to throw my whole life away for my baby.
Telling me to give up my hobbies and things.
I know things are going to change some but I get to hear it multiple times like it’s this big daunting thing gets annoying eventually”.
PLEASE STOP THAT COMMENT!! let the pregnant enjoy her pregnancy and let her be optimistic about her future.
8- Your body will never be the same:
Again! another frustrating comment. Please stop saying that to a pregnant woman and let her enjoy her pregnancy and motherhood.
9- Women have been doing it for handred of Years:
A pregnant said: ” The worse for me is if I’m complaining and someone says “women have been doing it for hundreds of years”.
Yes, I know that women have been doing it for thousands of years, but I’m pretty sure they all complained too!! Because they still a human being like us!
10- You should focus just on the baby:
A lady said: “28 weeks and honestly probably when I’m stressed or in a down mood or having issues with work, people telling me I gotta focus on the baby and the baby is more important than work, and the baby this and the baby that, kinda like I don’t exist and dont have to worry about myself or anything else in my life.
Like I get that the babies important but if I don’t have a job, I cant keep a roof over her head. If I don’t take care of my mental health, I can’t be a good mother for her. If I don’t worry about bills and budgeting how am I going to afford diapers and stuff, etc.
It gets frustrating with people always acting like I’m not also a human being just because I have a baby growing inside me”.
And I agree with her, even when we have babies in our tummies, we still a human being and need to think about ourselves as well.
11- Are you planning to finish your study?
A pregnant woman said : “So far, I had a lady randomly come up to me and ask how far along I am, and then proceeded to be snooby and hateful and ask if I plan to finish highschool.
I’m in college and I’m going to graduate a month after the baby is born”.
Yes, it’s a bit challenging to have a newborn and study at the same time, but you could. It just need a strong will.
12- ” oh! I thought you already have more kids!!” You should never say to a pregnant!
A lady told us about an annoying comment she always hear like: “Oh, this is your first?! I thought you already had one or two at home,” by nurses, CNAs and midwives who were assuming that a woman of age (38) should already have kids”.
Yes, I totally agree with her in this point, and this happened to me as well when a hairdresser was chatting with me while doing her job.
After asking me several questions about my history, she seems to be shocked when she knew that I’m married since 2011 and have just one kid!
It was a very inappropriate behaviour!
13- Are you going to try again for a …….:
Like “Are you going to try again for a girl?”
Or ” Are you going to try again for a boy?”
Or “You have to keep going until you get a girl?”
Or “when do you think you’ll have the next one?”
If you ask these questions, the pregnant will feel like “Can I get this one out first before we talk more?”
14- You look like you have a ……:
Like: ” you look like you have a boy”, or ” you look like you have a girl”.
A lady said: “My in-laws told me up and down I was going to have a boy because of how my belly hung. Even though I had a blood test and ultrasound to prove otherwise”.
15- You shouldn’t do that when you’re pregnant:
Like: ” Don’t lift anything”.
” Don’t keep your dogs “.
” Don’t walk too much”.
” You shouldn’t drink coffee “. Etc..
Thanks for your advice! But, believe me, as soon as she discovered her pregnancy, she made a complete search about what to do and what to avoid during pregnancy.
16- I don’t like the name you chose for your baby!
A lady said: “My mother in law said she didn’t like the name Rose for our daughter because she was worried she would end up homely!”.
Another lady said: “I’m naming my daughter Devin Blair. Blair after my grandpa who passed away. My Aunt tells my sister “oh my God! That sounds like Devil!”
Any way, the parents will name there baby the name they love regardless of what anyone thinks.
17- You have to eat for two!
When you tell a pregnant lady that she should eat more because she is eating for two!
No, please I want to keep my pregnancy weight gain under control!
You don’t need to eat any extra food in the first two trimesters of pregnancy. In the third trimester you may need to eat around 200 calories extra. Source.
Now, I’d be happy to hear from you what are the things that you didn’t like to hear during pregnancy, please tell us your experience in a comment..
please, share the post with your family, friends and whoever you want so that all the people know what questions are really annoying to a pregnant woman..